Tapping Into My Well of Support
This summer has been an intentional time for me to engage in a deeper interrogation of my own leadership. And, for me, taking an honest inventory requires me to seek advice from others who know me, want me to succeed always, and have seen me fail. The honesty, unwavering support, and love that I can find in many of my friends and colleagues help me stay honest in my quest to be the best leader I can be in all aspects of my life. This year, for the first time, I chose to reach into that supportive well.
You may have noticed, the last three months, I have featured amazing guest bloggers! Pamela Anglin encouraged us to identify “What’s Your Why,” Roz Kincaid shared “The 5 Blocks to Embracing Your Unique Path,” and Dr. Dee (Dayanara Marte) dropped some sobering knowledge about “Healing with Accountability.” Check out their posts if you have not already done so!
I never recommend, share, or offer to others what I have not tried, experienced, or tested myself. So, as they have been writing and sharing their wisdom to the FMC community, I have taken their advice, talked to them about my own journey and what their questions stir up for me. These fierce leaders and their knowledge supported me during my summer of personal leadership reflection, and I am deeply grateful.
Here is what I have learned by taking their advice to heart and answering honestly some of the questions they have posed:
- By reflecting on my why, I realized that being able to identify my feelings and name them are only part of the equation. An important next step for me is to choose how your feelings can help or hinder the way that I want to be most engaged. For me, that means that I may not act on all the feelings if it does not help me get to the function (or role) that I want to play.
- It is hard for me to not act on all my feelings yet it feels so liberating! Some of my feelings are just that – are there to acknowledge, sit with, and they pass or transform into other feelings. Not all feelings require or demand any action, they just demand respect and space. The internal growth I’ve gained from sitting with my feelings have truly been life changing. The biggest change has been for myself, my confidence, and my clarity about my life’s path and journey.
- One of the things I am always considering in every season of my life is how to protect and preserve the freedom to lead authentically and the vision I hold for my future. I have learned that I must do what feels right and is aligned for how I want to show up in the world whether people agree or not and regardless of it being attached to outcomes. I am now clear that the objections from outsiders or being too attached to outcomes limit my growth and could potentially block my path.
- The hardest thing that I have finally come to terms with is that I have to hold myself accountable to my own healing. Living life is bound to illuminate things, situations, experiences that necessitate healing. My ability to heal personally influences my development and evolution as a leader, and in doing so I can operate with leaders and organizations in ways that demand accountability. This, too, helps me continually evolve and grow my leadership now and can become in the future.